REFLECTIONS OF A SCHOLAR

CAMPUS VIBES

If you are privileged to have your feet in one of the most "prestigious" public universities or TVET institutions in the Republic of Kenya, the word "Kuinama" should definitely ring a bell. To the cool kids from Strathmore or USIU, kuinama is simply when a comrade skips a meal or two so that he/she can have a decent meal.  It is one of the greatest inventions among students in combating the high cost of living. By the way, I hope we are clear, when I say " a decent meal" I'm simply referring to chapati and beans hapo kwa mathee. Comrades are sometimes very broke, no wonder it is sometimes very difficult to pay attention during lectures (pun intended).

Before reading further, I would like to stress that the views expressed in this article are solely mine. My article is intended to educate and inform my readers. Not to stereotype any person or institution.

JKUAT Avenue

By now you can conquer with me that nothing much really goes on at the campus. You know… a little reading only when exams and cats are around the corner and of course the fear of getting to do supplementary exams is what pushes the majority of us to read. It is kshs 800 per paper in our school, so I heard. Most comrades spend most of their time playing pool, PlayStation, drinking, and smoking weed. I believe that's the sole reason why they're called institutions of "higher" learning.

Students’ Life in Campus: Juggling School, work, and Life

If you are a comrade from the highly glorified Juja maica, we can all agree that the famous “containers” is the pinnacle of "kupiga Sherehe". You should definitely pay a visit to that place if you haven't. As I jot this down, that Song by Ndovu Kuu and Khaligraph  Jones about a neighboring university is literally playing in my head:  

Mtoto wangu akiitwa KU ntakataa.Hakunanga masomo ...( not my words)

On another note:

One thing I really cherish about being a comrade is that you won't be broke forever. Just the other day, not long ago, I was brushing shoulders with the likes of Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos. HELB had just wired some funds to my starving bank account and guess who was bidding kuinama goodbye for the next couple of days? You guessed right. In my quest of "kupigia mwili pole", I decided to take this petite girl out on a date. I've been seeing her and she's been seeing me. Today I just wanted to make things formal and try out my luck. We call it shooting your shot. This girl was such a beauty. She had long nails. I've been told that they are called stick-on nails. She liked applying a lot of makeup. A typical slay Queen. You know how they roll. When she walked, every man would pause and gaze at her behind. She made team mafisi drool because they literally had to " kula kwa macho".

Men ogling at a beautiful girl

So, I called her up and I took the wheel (not literally of course), and off we went to one of the exquisite restaurants here at Juja city mall. The name of the restaurant is Caffé Leo. What happened in the next couple of minutes was ‘astounding’. When the menu came, she didn't know a damn thing in there, not even something as basic as a caffé mocha or virgin mojito. She blankly stared at the menu for a minute until after I had placed my order and she said with a tweng "nipatie kama yake". Being a coffee enthusiast, I ordered Americano.  If you're an amateur in the realm of coffee, I would strongly suggest you start with Cappuccino or house coffee. They are sweet. Americano and Espresso are very concentrated and very bitter. You won’t like it for a start.

The waiter brought the coffee and I immediately noticed the disappointment on her face. I believe she thought it was something fancy cause she is probably used to Chips and Kuku as her all-time favorite. Americano sounds fancy. I won't blame her. It gets even more interesting. When she took the first sip, she almost spat it out, I could tell from the look on her face. Honestly speaking, I almost burst with laughter but being the gentleman that I am, I saved the experience for my boys and of course for you who is reading this. A very embarrassing moment for her. She didn't have the guts to maintain eye contact for the next couple of minutes. She resorted to using the cafeteria WIFI.  I wondered whether she knew the meaning of the word WIFI. Did I just ruin my date? You be the judge.

Well, this situation however hilarious it may sound, is not unique. For me, it’s a matter of concern whose occurrence is more than meets the eye. Let me set a further context to this. The bitter reality is that campus is filled with SOME cute dumb lads and lasses. I have not said ALL. Some people don't read anything here on campus. I am not referring to academic material here. I'm talking about a goddamn novel, a newspaper, or any other relevant educative material. We just can't raise a generation of men who the only thing they can talk about is Manchester United and Arsenal or a society of ladies whose meaningful conversation is Rihanna’s or the Kardashians’ latest IG post. NO! Hapana. We just can't keep up this way. So, my beautiful readers and my awesome campus friends, pick a book and read. Watch documentaries and docuseries too. Get insights from TED TALKS. Get to know what's happening around you. Listen to podcasts. Pick a menu and read. Hone your communication skills. You just can't keep on nodding in every conversion or worse say uweeh! and waah! in every topic. Be an all-rounded person. Don't be cute and dumb.

Of course, you don’t have to know everything in this life. You will always be a rookie at some things. When you are not sure about something, there is no shame in saying ‘I don’t understand’. Always ask when you are not sure. That’s how we learn. Kuuliza sio ujinga.And take heed or else you will make a fool out of yourself and you will probably have to learn the hard way. My honorable reader, you don’t have to always learn the hard way. But most importantly, don't forget to tell your friends to read and subscribe to my monthly publications of D. A~ Got Thoughts. And off course if you don't want me to " inama" unaweza tuma kitu na usisahau ya kutoa ju manze form sio poa.

Just in case you are wondering whether I got lucky with my campus slay queen, well, a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell.

Live and let live. Adiós.